nip butt

i am at the butt. for what? i dont know. how about that?

come morning, i have to wake babs up to get her school work done. which i assumed she hadn't cos she went back to sleep. my worry are for her completion of her school project cos she was way too tired last night to continue. and from whatever shits happened last night between her and "lemon" (unidentified fuckin object, UFO) is totally uncalled for. well babs was composed enuff to offer her apology and moved on with school work. but this lemon just go on and be sarcastic instead. if she were my classmate, i would have thrown her out of the window....

then i got to know that my counterparts from vancouver are in my office. jeff, francis and patrick de buse are in town. and i only know about it when it was 9.30am. when sze bee asked me to go for the meeting. i didnt get the message waiyin send earlier. ohh.. perhaps she's sent it to the V3 phone. its with babs. that explains.

in the meeting discussing the future of my company's relationship with vancouver and the gikue thing, babs called. at first i put down her call cos i was in the midst of discussion. then i saw her calls and text message asking to call her. i bet this time round is of something important. so i left the meeting room to give her a buzz. true enuff, she had an interview and she was in a situation that she had to hang around somewhere and not return home early. i was taken back for this surprise meeting or i could have go as planned, which was to send babs to tg pagar and collect the monitor tv she was entitled to at funan IT mall. babs didnt sound happy when i couldnt go as planned.. but i have a situation which i just cant leave right away. lucky enuff she was prompt to react to the situation. i really do hope she understands my situation cos this was taken a total surprise.

so after the customers left, i was arranged to bring the customer around town. knowing the fact that i was the closest to them and they are going to leave tomorrow, i had to go for that without much choice. my colleagues are backing me up well for my uprunnin project.

then another situation. which ends up in an unpleasant manner. she got home without telling me. and why would u think i kept the discipline of sending text to her everytime... EVERYTIME i reached home. and with her being pissed of the situation, didnt even tell me her wherabouts until i asked. bla bla bla.. associate with me still having a mother... WHAT WAS THAT FOR? when did i include mak into the picture? did she see that all the things questioned was about her. i have been very sensitive about mentioning about mak since she passed away cos i do want her to divert her attention to the things that she needs to do. and why in the first place i get to the butt of this anger? what have i done wrong? I REALLY DONT KNOW!! Lied to get the time off with me? HOW? What was being tied down? and to label me not putting my priorities right is so hurting. How devoted i was to whatever is happening was from a sicere heart. and to get such comments... it does makes me feel useless at prioritizing my life.

Does she see my questions are all about herself? I just want to know if she'd done it. Is that something wrong? And she had been complaining about the situations she had about school, work, family, life... im ok with that. That was why i asked if she'd done so. If she did, that would be great. so she's got better things to complain about other than the completed tasks. and she jolly well know that i will be there for her. And life will embark to a new situation. Systematic enough? But why does she have to get all my good intentions wrong? Havent i been all the while there with her? Havent i been giving her the listening ears. Havent i been supportive of her? Havent I did things to make her move on slowly? Does she see all those intentions i have for her? And what have i done to get all those tones from her? What if im pissed with something else and talked the same way she talks to me? Would she feel that would be unfair to associate other faults on her? of course she will. and of course thats what im feeling right now.